11 things you say goodbye to when you have children

I obviously watch far too many episodes of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, because I was hoping my experience of motherhood would be just like Kourtney’s: 3 kids, my own ‘glam squad’, regular partying, a personal trainer, super healthy organic food, sexy photo shoots and a quick stop at Kanye’s Fashion Week show. But this is not the case people!
Everything that you considered to be ‘normal life’ before you had children suddenly becomes a bonus. Like writing blogs. I’ve been writing this blog for about 3 weeks.

Does anyone fully comprehend the sacrifices they have to make when they have children? I definitely did not, but at 4 months in i’m doing ok. Who would’ve thought I’d be happy with a cold cup of tea every day!

Here are 11 things you say goodbye to when you become a mother:

1. Food
You’ll never finish a meal in one sitting. Soggy cereal, half eaten sandwiches and cold food become life. Make friends with your microwave, because it’s about to become your best friend.

2. A hot cup of tea
Just as you’re about to drink it, the baby will cry. Every time!

3. Your hair
When your baby is around 4 months old you’ll start shedding your hair. I’m talking Cousin It quantities of hair here! All over your bed, floor, carpets, not to mention clogging up your plug holes.

4. Clean hair
Ok so I only wash what I have left of my hair once a week, but these days I’m lucky if I can even do that.

5. Straighteners
Wait, you actually thought you’d have time to straighten your hair?! Maybe if you have a babysitter.

6. Shopping
Make sure you know where the nearest exit is, because you’re gonna need it when the baby decides to kick off in the raw meat ailse.

7. Sleep
The days of lying in bed until 10am are well and truly OVER. And don’t even talk to me about the 4 month sleep regression, I mean what is that!

8. Clean clothes
Sick, poo, sick, poo, sick, poo. Repeat.

9. A tidy house
Considering they don’t do anything for a good few months, babies come with a lot of crap, and it’s mostly situated all over your floor.

10. Normal conversation 
From now on, you only talk about babies, because that’s all you know.

11. Posture
You spend your days looking like Quasimodo, constantly bending over to pick your baby up, bath it or change its nappy.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s